Ronica Black

Spring Memories

2011-04-30T13:20:00.000-07:00

My late grandmother adored Spring. She loved the newness, the re-freshing of the earth, the way it all seemed to birth beneath God's stirring fingers. She was a very religious woman but she wasn't preachy. If I could call her a Buddhist Christian I would because that was exactly what she reminded me of. She believed in peace, harmony, love, forgiveness and acceptance. To me she was saint-like and the woman never seemed to judge or make rash decisions or over react. She just accepted people and helped them. She encouraged them to do the right thing.

Unfortunately, I didn't get much time with my grandmother. I lived in AZ and she in NC. I was lucky if I got to see her every summer. She died at age 63 with pancreatic cancer. I was seventeen (1993). The summer before she passed I spent several weeks with her. I'd get up at about 1am, unable to sleep and there she'd be rocking in her recliner, in so much pain she couldn't sleep either. But she never really complained. Just said her "monster" was bothering her. That's what she called her tumor. Her monster. And we would sit there all night long, her smoking one cigarette after another, pushing one bunioned foot against the floor to continue her rocking motion. Sometimes we just sat and enjoyed the dark. Other times we talked. I loved picking her brain. I asked her about raising my father and uncles and what it was like to have 5 boys. She laughed and said it wasn't too bad. That she awoke every morning and read her bible and smoked and then read some of a good book. That time alone helped her more than anything.

And then we got on the subject of dreams. She said she dreamt in black and white. I asked what her most memorable dream was. She thought for a moment and said, "Well there's one I'll never forget..."

She was driving with my grandfather and all 5 boys. They had taken a scenic drive and were heading home when they came upon an abandoned house. They pulled over and the boys got out to explore. The house was two story and large and out in the middle of a field with nothing else around. Soon clouds started rolling in and they started calling for the boys. But only four would come out. So they'd get four in the car and go looking for the other one. But they could never find him. And in her dream she never knew which boy it was, just that one was missing. The storm came and it was awful because they couldn't find him in that big old house and they had to leave to save the rest of them. She said she always woke up terrified and that she had that dream for about a year.

Then my uncle Mark got sick. He was four at the time. He had luekemia and he couldn't be saved. She said when he passed the dream stopped. I was floored and I told her she was psychic. Her response? "Lord, I'm not psychic. That was just God's way of preparing me."

I'll never forget that. What a woman. Her mother, my great grandmother who shared my birthday, also died soon after Mark. And I wonder just how awful that time must have been for my grandmother, losing her youngest son and mother so soon together. In 1962 they didn't have all the treatment for cancer that they do now and I can't imagine how horrible it must've been for Mark and my grandmother and everyone else around them. But she survived. And her family survived and they moved on. Until the arrival of the monster.

I asked her about that. About how she felt about the cancer and about dying. She said she always knew she'd get sick and die like this. So it didn't surprise her or anger her. And dying was just going home to God. Like falling asleep and going home. And she said she'd see me in the morning. In fact that's what is on her headstone. "I'll see you in the morning." Makes me cry thinking about it but I can't help it because she's all I've thought about lately. It's Spring and I planted wild flowers and recalled taking her for drives that summer just so she could see the wildflowers. She loved them and that's what she wanted on her casket. I miss her so much it hurts. But I'm so grateful I had such a soul in my life and in my heart. What knowledge, what character, what love.

So as I plant these flowers with my niece and nephew and they begin to come up, I just smile and think about how she loved Spring and the flowers and the new growth. A fresh breath from God breathed upon the land. And I look at my loves, at my God children, at my nieces and nephews and I see her in them. All the time. Especially in Ella Catherine who is named after her. There is a special soul there. And one day i wouldn't be surprised if she looked at me and said, "Nana, it's no big deal. I'll just see you in the morning."

Palm Springs

2011-01-20T10:10:00.000-08:00

March is getting closer and that means Palm Springs! Join us this year for the annual BSB book festival! Fun in the sun and a slew of your favorite authors to meet and greet!

Check out fellow author Kim Baldwin's video about it! Click on the link and then make your plans to join us! http://www.youtube.com/watch%3Ev=EKm16jA-hA

We gotta puppy, we gotta puppy, we gotta puppy hey hey hey!

2011-01-09T18:22:00.000-08:00

Ok, so it's not ours per say. It belongs to Cait's oldest but we get to have him whenever we want! His name is Pongo and he's about six weeks old. He was rescued at just two weeks old along with his litter mates. They had been removed from their mother way too early and physical abuse was also suspected. Pongo was malnourished and even a bruised a little. Very very sad. But he's okay now! He was the runt so he's still tiny but he's full of life and curiosity. He has a goofy walk and he loves to snuggle. Needless to say Cait is hopelessly in love. I love seeing her happy like this. Warms my heart.

Cleo, my Jack Russell, is handling the new visitor well. She tried to play with him when they first met but he wanted nothing to do with her! Today she's sort of ignoring him. Maya, our Aussie mix likes him okay but she has growled at him a few times. I think she's allowed though, as an old woman. It's old dog privilege.

So that's the low down. This week I'm working, lots of writing to do!

Until later,
Ronnie

A New Design

2010-12-28T14:25:00.000-08:00

With the new year appoaching, I've decided to scrap the old website and design something new. I've donned Charlie my new blog mascot. He's been working hard on a Chasing Love mural. I've always loved him, (even named my cat after him) so I thought he'd be appropriate here and he'll make appearances from time to time. Those who know me well will chuckle. Just be thankful I don't quote The Great Dictator, which btw, is one of the funniest movies ever made. Trust me on that one. ;)

Also, with the oncoming new year, I've decided to take my writing in some new directions. I've teamed with the 99 Series to write a book on bullying. It's something that's long been close to my heart and I think now more than ever a book on the subject is greatly needed. The 99 Series publishes in a unique format, one I think parents and teens will be drawn to as opposed to the standard books on the subject. Check out their site. http://www.99-series.com/ They publish all kinds of self help and I bet you'll find more than a few that interest you. Many thanks to Helen and Michael for taking me on board. xoxo. I will also be posting info on how you can earn money by partnering with us at 99. Exciting things ahead!

More writing... I've just finished Conquest, my matinee erotic romance. I'm anxious to see the finished product. My next book, Wholehearted will be another full length fiction book. I'm really looking forward to this one. I will post the synopsis soon!

I've also got a few other books on my table at the moment. Yes...some horror, which honestly is my true passion. I love it.

So that's the low down for now. Welcome! And feel free to drop me a line!

Best,
Ronnie